Many people think that every individual is responsible for their happiness, but some people believe
학생이 쓴 원문
I think happiness depends on personal mind. I can be happy how I think regardless of wealth, health and factors around me. However, if I can\'t keep my basic life from food to hosing, I can\'t have positive mind for my life. I would feel frustrated, exhausted and see the world like disaster. Education for children and basic right should be guaranteed by the government. People also need jobs to get money. The monk who is really famous in Korea said that people have to try not to have many things. He suggested us to empty our mind by training like meditation. He also stressed that happiness start from not to have any possessions. I partially agree with it but I think we can control ourselves if we can solve basic needs. We have heard a lot of stories about rich people that they are not always happy because humans desire are infinite. Rich people don\'t think that they are rich so they want to earn more money. Rich people have a lot of conflicts with their family members because of money.
강사 첨삭
Good morning MR. [이름]~! ^^ Thanks for doing your homework! ^^Tuesday is a good day to reflect on the types of thoughts you are feeding your mind each day! Have a good one~! See you!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think happiness depends on personal mind.
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR I think happiness depends on one\'s mind.
I can be happy how I think regardless of wealth, health and factors around me.
>>> I can be happy regardless of wealth, health and some factors around me.
However, if I can\'t keep my basic life from food to hosing, I can\'t have positive mind for my life.
>>> CORRECT
I would feel frustrated, exhausted and see the world like a disaster.
>>> CORRECT
Education for children and basic right should be guaranteed by the government.
>>> CORRECT
People also need jobs to get money.
>>> CORRECT
The monk who is really famous in Korea said that people have to try not to have many things.
>>> A monk who is really famous in Korea said that people have to try not to have many things.
He suggested us to empty our mind by training like meditation.
>>> He suggested us to empty our mind by meditation.
He also stressed that happiness start from not to have any possessions.
>>> He also stressed that happiness starts from not having any possessions.
I partially agree with it but I think we can control ourselves if we can solve basic needs.
>>> I partially agree with it but I think we can control ourselves if we can solve our basic needs.
We have heard a lot of stories about rich people that they are not always happy because humans\' desires are infinite.
>>> CORRECT
Rich people don\'t think that they are rich so they want to earn more money.
>>> CORRECT
Rich people have a lot of conflicts with their family members because of money.
>>> CORRECT
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