May 5, 2016

2016-05-03 · 첨삭 강사 Venus

학생이 쓴 원문

Too late apology from Oxy. In our country, the prosecution for Oxy company which is one of the biggest detergent company attracts many people's attention. It is charged with selling dangerous and unverified humidifier detergent that eventually leads to the deaths of more than 100 people. The first incident happened 5 years ago, but yesterday Oxy prepared the first press to indicate its position and present individual compensation. Why do they make up its mind to apology in 5 years while they haven't responded to victim's request at the first time? How can the victims receive the apology as a heartfelt? I sincerely hope that the prosecution discloses what Oxy misconducted and negotiate how they should compensate as soon as possible to make the victims suffer no longer.

강사 첨삭

Hello James! Impressive!  Some reminders:   If \'Too late apology from Oxy.\' is the title of your comment then you don\'t need a period at the end. Punctuations are usually used in sentences and within paragraphs. Oxy\'s firm apology too late  If \'Too late apology from Oxy.\' is not a title then you have to make it a complete sentence. Oxy\'s firm apology is too late.   Teacher Venus^^   Too late apology from Oxy.>>>Oxy\'s firm apology too lateIn our country, the prosecution for Oxy company which is one of the biggest detergent company attracts many people\'s attention. >>>CORRECT   It is charged with selling dangerous and unverified humidifier detergent that eventually leads to the deaths of more than 100 people. >>>CORRECT   The first incident happened 5 years ago, but yesterday Oxy prepared the first press to indicate its position and present individual compensation. >>>CORRECTWhy do they make up its mind to apology in 5 years while they haven\'t responded to victim\'s request at the first time? >>>CORRECT   How can the victims receive the apology as a heartfelt? >>>How can the victims receive the apology as a heartfelt apology? I sincerely hope that the prosecution discloses what Oxy misconducted and negotiate how they should compensate as soon as possible to make the victims suffer no longer. >>>CORRECT

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