money or happiness?
학생이 쓴 원문
Some people says that if we don't have money, we probably can't alive.
We always need money because we have to eat, buy and something to do.
I also agree that money is very important for us.
Sometimes I'm very irritated when my wallet is empty.
If i don't have enough money, i won't buy what i need.
But more important, i can get along with my friends except much money.
I think friends, love, family such what we cannot seeing is more crucial than money.
강사 첨삭
Hello there, Bella!! ^_^
Thank you for doing your homework, dear.
I agree with your answer! Yes, money is important.
With money we can buy all the things that we need.
But money can\'t buy happiness. Do you agree with that? ^_^
Well, I\'ll just see you later! Have a wonderful afternoon, Bella!
Happy weekend!
~Teacher May
By the way, here are your corrections:
Some people says that if we don\'t have money, we probably can\'t alive.
>> correct!We always need money because we have to eat, buy and something to do.
>> We always need money because we have to eat, and buy all the necessary things for us.
>>OR: We always need money because we have to buy food and all the necessary things that we need.I also agree that money is very important for us.
>> correct!Sometimes I\'m very irritated when my wallet is empty.
>> correct!
>>OR: Sometimes I feel very irritated when my wallet is empty.If i don\'t have enough money, i won\'t buy what i need.
>> If I don\'t have enough money, I can\'t buy what I need.But more important, i can get along with my friends except much money.
>> But more important is that, I can get along with my friends even though I don\'t have much money.I think friends, love, family such what we cannot seeing is more crucial than money.
>> I think friends, love one, and family are more important than money.
>>OR: I think friendship, relationship with others and family are more important than money.
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