More and more parents are allowing their children to play on computers and tablets as they think tha

2020-06-12 · 첨삭 강사 Gemma

학생이 쓴 원문

Yuval Noah Harari, famous author, wrote Sapiens insist that first agricultural revolution is a fraud because people expected that their life would be better if they could cultivate rice and crops, however their life was harder, more tired and they were busier after the revolution. People used to get food by themselves but they had to work all day to get food from owner in the farm. That\'s not people would like to do. Information technology revolution has same aspect like the agricultural revolution. We thought that we could save a lot of time, if we used it in our business and life. However, We have been working more and more, because we can send e-mail to clients and can receive reply from them in few minutes and then we have to send it again and again. I guess that our life has not improved a lot since we used a computer. We are still under the high pressure from the work. That might not be expected when we introduced the computer system. However, It became the part of our life

강사 첨삭

Hi there~! Happy Friday Mr. [이름]! It\'s raining in my country now. There\'s a typhoon! :( I hope it won\'t last. Thanks for doing your homework. Enjoy your day~! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Yuval Noah Harari, famous author, wrote Sapiens insist that first agricultural revolution is a fraud because people expected that their life would be better if they could cultivate rice and crops, however their life was harder, more tiring and they were busier after the revolution.
>>> CORRECT
 People used to get food by themselves but they had to work all day to get food from the owner in the farm. 
>>> CORRECT
That\'s not people would like to do.
>>> CORRECT
 Information technology revolution has the same aspect like the agricultural revolution.
>>> CORRECT
We thought that we could save a lot of time, if we used it in our business and life.
>>> CORRECT
 However, we have been working more and more, because we can send e-mails to clients and can receive a reply from them in few minutes and then we have to send it again and again.
>>> CORRECT
 I guess that our life has not improved a lot since we use a computer.
>>> CORRECT
 We are still under the high pressure of work. 
>>> CORRECT
That might not be expected when we introduced the computer system. 
>>> CORRECT
However, it became a part of our life.
>>> CORRECT

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