More and more people are finding it increasingly important to wear fashionable clothes. Is this atti
학생이 쓴 원문
The fashion trends have changed in ages and returned to the old fashion. It is important to follow the new trends from the fashion to the style. Especially, young people would like to lead the trends because it helps them gain confidence. There are many benefit to follow trends. Firstly, people can improve the sense of fashion and design. Secondly, they can learn the functional materials which is used for making clothes. Lastly, People can enjoy their life because clothes make people pleased. However, it also has serious adverse effect. Young students have purchased really expensive outer competitively because they wanted to show off their financial power. Students tend to imitate what their friends do. These phenomenon cause parents\'s concern because parents need to buy it for their lovely children, if not children might be bullied by their friends. So many adults bought these clothes that seems like over household\'s budget. I want to encourage people to express their personality by v
강사 첨삭
DELIGHTFUL DAY MR. [이름]~! ^^
If you love what you\'re doing, you’ll be out there every day trying to do it the best you possibly can, and pretty soon everybody around will catch the passion from you!
The only difference between success and failure is the ability to take action.
Enjoy taking possibilities~! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The fashion trends have changed in ages and returned to the old fashion.
>>> CORRECT
It is important to follow the new trends from the fashion to the style.
>>> CORRECT
Especially, young people would like to lead the trends because it helps them gain confidence.
>>> CORRECT
There are many benefit to follow trends.
>>> There are many benefits to follow some trends.
Firstly, people can improve the sense of fashion and design.
>>> CORRECT
Secondly, they can learn the functional materials which is used for making clothes.
>>> CORRECT
Lastly, People can enjoy their life because clothes make people pleased.
>>> Lastly, people can enjoy their life because clothes please people.
However, it also has serious adverse effect.
>>> CORRECT
Young students have purchased really expensive outer competitively because they wanted to show off their financial power.
>>> Young students have purchased expensive outer competitively because they wanted to show off their financial power.
Students tend to imitate what their friends do.
>>> CORRECT
These phenomenon cause parents\' concern because parents need to buy it for their lovely children, if not children might be bullied by their friends.
>>> CORRECT
So many adults bought these clothes that seems like over household\'s budget.
>>> So many adults buy these clothes which is like over the household\'s budget.
I want to encourage people to express their personality by...
>>> CORRECT
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