Music

2011-10-20 · 첨삭 강사 camille

학생이 쓴 원문

I also like to listening to music very much. When I commute , I always listen to something which is English conversation or just a song. Music enriches our life. When I am in a bad mood , music heals me. and music is also good friend on my journey. When I drive , listening to music is very helpful not to fall asleep. The main way of listening to music is using my iphone. Before buying it, I brought a mp3 player with me. But since i phone is 2 in 1 gadget , I don't have to bring a mp3 player anymore. In ordet to put music into i phone , we need to do synchronization between PC and I-phone. That is one of the biggest weaknesses i phone has. Compared with I-phone , other phone maker using android operating system doesn't need synhronization.

강사 첨삭

Hello there my dear [이름], Thank you so much for dropping in your composition..:) Here are the following corrections, I hope they can help you... Talk to you later my dear..T.Cam   I also like to listening to music very much. >>I like listening to music very much.When I commute , I always listen to something which is English conversation or just a song. >.correct!Music enriches our life. When I am in a bad mood , music heals me. >>correct!and music is also good friend on my journey. >>correct!When I drive , listening to music is very helpful not to fall asleep.>>correct!The main way of listening to music is using my iphone. >>correct!Before buying it, I brought a mp3 player with me. >>Before buying it, I brought an mp3 player with me.But since i phone is 2 in 1 gadget , I don't have to bring a mp3 player anymore. >>But since i phone is 2 in 1 gadget , I don't have to bring an mp3 player anymore.In ordet to put music into i phone , we need to do synchronization between PC and I-phone. >>In ordet to put music into an i phone , we need to do synchronization between PC and I-phone.That is one of the biggest weaknesses i phone has. >>That is one of the biggest disadvantage an i phone has.Compared with I-phone , other phone maker using android operating system doesn't need synhronization. >>correct!  

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