My application for WFK(3RD)

2019-09-09 · 첨삭 강사 Kate

학생이 쓴 원문

In addition, I was nominated as new department manager as merging KEB bank and Hana Bank at 2016. The role of the department was effective computer system integration of two banks. I successfully finished the role. I will try effective debt management processing system at your country.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]!
I\'m really looking forward to meeting you tomorrow! Thank you for sending these composition to give me an idea about your background. I would like to know more when we start having classes. ^^
~~Teacher Kate

1. In addition, I was nominated as new department manager as merging KEB bank and Hana Bank at 2016.
>>In addition, I was nominated as new department manager when KEB bank and Hana Bank merged in 2016.
2. The role of the department was effective computer system integration of two banks.
>>The role of the department was to ensure effective computer system integration of the two banks.
3. I successfully finished the role. I will try effective debt management processing system at your country.
>>CORRECT!

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