My first movie
학생이 쓴 원문
I want to make a movie about the genius musician and dancer. The main chracters are two girls who are genius musician and genius dancer. They meet first in the park. The musician sings in the park everyday and the dancer listens everyday in the same time. Almost 3 months after, the musician writes music thinking of the mysterious girl. The next day she sings with new music and that time the dancer dance in front of the musician. The people watching their performance applaud. After the day, the genius musician and dancer discuss their music and dance, and they make performance together. Before long, the musician can dance and the dancer can sing. They become popular and they perform in the stage. The fantastic duo\'s performance is wonderful and they feel happy with music and dance.
- The end -
강사 첨삭
Hello, [이름]!
Thank you for submitting your composition.
It was an interesting story and I can\'t help imagining it.
It feels like a story of friendship chasing their dreams together.
It\'s heartwarming. ^^
~Teacher Gina
>> CORRECT.
The main chracters are two girls who are genius musician and genius dancer.
>> The main characters are two girls who are a genius musician and a genius dancer.
They meet first in the park.
>> They first met in the park.
The musician sings in the park everyday and the dancer listens everyday in the same time.
>> The musician sings in the park everyday and the dancer listens everyday at the same time.
Almost 3 months after, the musician writes music thinking of the mysterious girl.
>> CORRECT.
The next day she sings with new music and that time the dancer dance in front of the musician.
>> The next day she sings with new music and that time the dancer danced in front of the musician.
The people watching their performance applaud.
>> The people watching their performance applauded.
After the day, the genius musician and dancer discuss their music and dance, and they make performance together.
>> After that day, the genius musician and dancer discuss their music and dance, and they made a performance together.
Before long, the musician can dance and the dancer can sing.
>> CORRECT.
They become popular and they perform in the stage.
>> They become popular and they perform on the stage.
The fantastic duo\'s performance is wonderful and they feel happy with music and dance.
>> CORRECT.
- The end -
- The end -
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