My opinion for growing children

2020-03-13 · 첨삭 강사 Melody

학생이 쓴 원문

Dear [Name], When I was children, I lived in country. it is only a ground for rice and vegetable nearby my house. I knew that it was all of world. but when I grew up, I acknowledged another things inthe world. That was a city with cars, buses, trains, buildings... I ate only rice with Kimchi, but a children in city ate a chinese food, stake . . I did not know at that time. Now, I had a lot of friends. High school , university, company. Most of them live in city. They don\'t understand my children\'s time. They ate a delicious food everyday. but I didn\'t. So, I agree with living city when there is children.

강사 첨삭

1. When I was children, I lived in country.
>>When I was a child, I lived in the countryside.

2. it is only a ground for rice and vegetable nearby my house.
>>There is only a ground for rice and vegetables nearby our house.

3. I knew that it was all of world.
>>I knew that it was all of the world. 

4. but when I grew up, I acknowledged another things inthe world.
>>But when I grew up, I acknowledged another thing in the world. 

5. That was a city with cars, buses, trains, buildings...
>>That was the city with cars, buses, trains, buildings and more.

6. I ate only rice with Kimchi, but a children in city ate a chinese food, stake . .
>>I ate only rice with kimchi, but children in the city ate Chinese food, steak and more.

7. I did not know at that time. 
>>I did not know it at that time. 

8. Now, I had a lot of friends. 
>>Now, I have a lot of friends.

9. High school , university, company. 
>>I met them when I was in high school , in the university and in the company. 

10. Most of them live in city. 
>>Most of them live in the city.

11. They don\'t understand my children\'s time.
>>They don\'t understand my childhood.

12. They ate a delicious food everyday.
>>They ate delicious food everyday.

13. but I didn\'t.
>>But, I didn\'t.

14. So, I agree with living city when there is children. 
>>So, I agree that children should live in the city.

Very good.
- T. Melody ^^

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