My Three Thing To Achieve
학생이 쓴 원문
First, I want to make friends with all my classmates this year.
Because I can play fun if I have a lot of friends and I won\'t worry when I am in 3rd grades.
Second, I will got 95 scores in my first test. It is very important for my future high school. So I will study very hard and got 95 scores.
Third, I will take care of myself. I should eat lots of water and sleep more than now.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]! Well done on accomplishing your homework! These changes aim to make the text clearer, more grammatically correct, and smoother to read.
First, I want to make friends with all my classmates this year.
>>> First, I want to make friends with all my classmates this year
Because I can play fun if I have a lot of friends and I won\'t worry when I am in 3rd grades.
>>> because having many friends means I can have more fun, and I won\'t worry when I am in 3rd grade.
Second, I will got 95 scores in my first test.
Second, I will got 95 scores in my first test.
>>> Second, I will aim to score 95 on my first test.
It is very important for my future high school.
>>> It is very important for my future high school.
So I will study very hard and got 95 scores.
>>> Therefore, I will study very hard to achieve this score.
Third, I will take care of myself.
Third, I will take care of myself.
>>> Third, I will take better care of myself.
I should eat lots of water and sleep more than now.
>>> I should drink plenty of water and get more sleep than I do now.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.