My wishes if I\'m not a public social worker
학생이 쓴 원문
First, I want to work in finance department.
One day, I watched the documentary. The producer chased the tax defaulter who didn\'t pay 26 million dollars. I know he is the top of tax defaulter in Korea. How awful it is!
Also I heard the news that The National Tax Service finally clawed back his assets, which are abroad!
I was satisfied after hearing that, and thought that the sense of justice still remain in our society.
Second, if I\'m stonger than now, I want to be a police officer.
I realize that I feel satisfaction after finding the clues and investigating causal relationship.
강사 첨삭
Hi there, [이름]!
It is wonderful to have you back here on the composition page writing about the other possibilities of your career\'s next chapter.
Chasing tax evaders may be pretty dangerous since these people may be armed and capable of violence to conceal their wealth. Through their cases, you can get a glimpse of their lifestyle and unearth things that you have never seen or experienced before. Remember that these people are high profile and live an eccentric life totally alien to us.
Being a police may be dangerous but adventurous if you are strong, able, and agile. As I watched women in movies and even in real life, they hold high positions in the military office because they simply can.
Go for your dreams, shoot for the stars. When your chapter in social work closes, your new journey begins.
Study the underlined parts of your composition and compare them to your original draft. Overall, you did a very good job!
See you tomorrow.
-T. Donna~
One day, I watched the documentary. The producer chased the tax defaulter who didn\'t pay 26 million dollars. I know he is the top of tax defaulter in Korea. How awful it is!
Also I heard the news that The National Tax Service finally clawed back his assets, which are abroad!
I was satisfied after hearing that, and thought that the sense of justice still remain in our society.
>>> First, I want to work in the finance department.
One day, I watched a documentary. The producer chased the tax evader who didn\'t pay 26 million dollars. I know he is the top tax evader in Korea. How awful it/that is!
Also, I heard the news that The National Tax Service finally clawed back his assets, which are abroad!
I was satisfied after hearing that, and thought that the sense of justice still remains in our society.
Second, if I\'m stonger than now, I want to be a police officer.
I realize that I feel satisfaction after finding the clues and investigating causal relationship.
One day, I watched a documentary. The producer chased the tax evader who didn\'t pay 26 million dollars. I know he is the top tax evader in Korea. How awful it/that is!
Also, I heard the news that The National Tax Service finally clawed back his assets, which are abroad!
I was satisfied after hearing that, and thought that the sense of justice still remains in our society.
Second, if I\'m stonger than now, I want to be a police officer.
I realize that I feel satisfaction after finding the clues and investigating causal relationship.
>>> Second, if I\'m stonger than now, I want to be a police officer.
I realize that I feel satisfaction after finding the clues and investigating causal relationships.파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.