New inventions in three years

2017-02-17 · 첨삭 강사 Lynn

학생이 쓴 원문

The world's population is steadily getting bigger and bigger. But the birth's rate in the developed countries is decreasing gradually, the number of old people is increasing. They will have a purchasing power in the future. Humans are basically important to the simplicity, convenience and environment-friendly. According to these tendency, we can predict the commodities of the future. First, we will need a commodity to take care of baby. It is a robot which takes care of a baby. For example, there will be a various baby products. And also, robots are made to help old people. But there must be a environment-friendly. Now, there is a world that sells fresh air. It may be a good opportunity for underdeveloped countries. It is because the countries are less pollution. I think that there will come up with products that demand eco-friendly products and convenience.

강사 첨삭

Hi there sir [이름]!
I really hope that happens in the very near future. Inventions which are Eco-friendly are needed now. See you on Monday!
Take care!
~T. Lynn
The world\'s population is steadily getting bigger and bigger.
>> correct!
But the birth\'s rate in the developed countries is decreasing gradually, the number of old people is increasing.
>> But the birth rate in the developed countries are decreasing gradually while the number of old people is increasing.
They will have a purchasing power in the future.
>> They will have purchasing power in the future.
Humans are basically important to the simplicity, convenience and environment-friendly.
>> It is basically important for humans to live simple, convenient and environmentally friendly lives.
According to these tendency, we can predict the commodities of the future.
>> According to these tendencies, we can predict the commodities of the future.
First, we will need a commodity to take care of baby. It is a robot which takes care of a baby.
>> correct!
For example, there will be various baby products. And also, robots are made to help old people.
>> correct!
But there must be a environment-friendly.
>> But these must be environment-friendly.
Now, there is a world that sells fresh air.
>> Now, that will be a world which will have a lot of fresh air.
OR>> That world will not a problem in air pollution.
It may be a good opportunity for underdeveloped countries.
>> correct!
It is because the countries are less pollution.
>> It is because these countries are less polluted.
I think that there will come up with products that demand eco-friendly products and convenience.
>> I think that they will come up with products that are Eco-friendly and convenient.

파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.

다른 영어첨삭교정 보기