People who has many pets

2021-04-28 · 첨삭 강사 Maine

학생이 쓴 원문

Almost everyone want to have a pet such as a dog or a cat. Also, they think sometimes it will be happy to raise many animals for their pets. However, is it really for owner to raise many animals? I think yes because many animal are friendly. When we back to the house from the work, they will welcome us as well as we won\'t be lonely. At the same time, I think no because If many animals are in my house, I think that I couldn\'t focus on each animals. In the other word, It can be happen that I can\'t take care them well. As a result, If I have many pets, It is bigger that I can\'t do well on them than that they give me happiness. So, I think it\'s better to raise one or two pets.

강사 첨삭

Hello Arim!

Thanks for doing your homework.  This will be of great help for your improvement! Keep it up!

-T. Maine


Almost everyone want to have a pet such as a dog or a cat.

>>Almost everyone wants to have a pet such as a dog or a cat.

Also, they think sometimes it will be happy to raise many animals for their pets.

>>Also, they sometimes think it is happier to raise many animals as their pets.

However, is it really for owner to raise many animals?

>>However, is it really good for owners to raise many animals?

I think yes because many animal are friendly.

>>I think yes because many animals are friendly.

When we back to the house from the work, they will welcome us as well as we won\'t be lonely.

>>When we go back to our houses from work, they will welcome us, so we won\'t be lonely.

At the same time, I think no because If many animals are in my house, I think that I couldn\'t focus on each animals.

>>In contrast, I think no because if many animals are in my house, I think I couldn\'t focus on taking care of each animal.

In the other word, It can be happen that I can\'t take care them well.

>>In other words, I can\'t raise them well.

As a result, If I have many pets, It is bigger that I can\'t do well on them than that they give me happiness.

>>As a result, if I have many pets, I can\'t take care of them more than all as well as they can\'t also give me happiness.

So, I think it\'s better to raise one or two pets.

>>So I think it\'s better to raise only one or two pets.

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