Personal improvement
학생이 쓴 원문
Personal improvement is important because for better own life. It is hard to improve our ability, so it is great only to sustain our ability. There is a metaphor about salmon going upstream the river. It is very hard to swim in the river and personal improvement is exceeding river flow. River flow is slow in some place, and fast in another place in case by case. I think personal improvement is decided by not also personal effort but also the situation and fortune. Anyway if the situation is bad we should do more effort in that time and someday the good situation will come whether by the effort or the fortune.
강사 첨삭
Good evening, [이름]!
Thank you for submitting your homework. ^^
~Teacher Gina
>> Personal improvement is important because it makes our own life better.
It is hard to improve our ability, so it is great only to sustain our ability.
>> It is hard to improve our ability but it is great to sustain it.
There is a metaphor about salmon going upstream the river.
>> There is a metaphor about salmon going upstream in the river.
It is very hard to swim in the river and personal improvement is exceeding river flow.
>> It is very hard to swim in the river and personal improvement is exceeding the river flow.
River flow is slow in some place, and fast in another place in case by case.
>> The river flow is slow in some places and fast in others, it\'s case by case.
I think personal improvement is decided by not also personal effort but also the situation and fortune.
>> I think personal improvement is decided not just by personal effort but also by situation and fortune.
Anyway if the situation is bad we should do more effort in that time and someday the good situation will come whether by the effort or the fortune.
>> Anyway if the situation is bad, we should do more effort in that time and someday the good situation will come whether by putting effort or by using fortune.
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