Plan to expand substitute holiday system gaining traction

2021-06-10 · 첨삭 강사 Don

학생이 쓴 원문

Dear [Name], Today, Let\'s talk about above issue. I think, we already talked about this issue without newpapers before. But I knew Korean worked a lot than any other people in the world through this news. I think, Korean enjoy working and find a hope from the company. but, it is bad choice. I think, it is impossible to find a hope from that. because a company is for salary at a result. If you leave the company which you worked hard, you will be awarded about this situation. See you when it is a lesson time

강사 첨삭

Hi there again Andre!

Thank you for this composition. See yah ^^

T. DON

Dear [Name],

Today, Let\'s talk about above issue.
>> Today, let\'s talk about the above issue in our class.

I think, we already talked about this issue without newpapers before.
>> I think, we already talked about this issue without this newspaper article before.

But I knew Korean worked a lot than any other people in the world through this news.
>> But I knew Koreans worked a lot than any other people in the world before this news was published.

I think, Korean enjoy working and find a hope from the company.
>> I think, Koreans enjoy working and finds hope from the company.

but, it is bad choice. I think, it is impossible to find a hope from that. because a company is for salary at a result.
>> But, it is a bad choice. I think, it is impossible to find hope from that because companies are paying  for salary at a result.

If you leave the company which you worked hard, you will be awarded about this situation.
>> If you leave the company which you worked hard for, you will be awarded with your loyalty.

See you when it is a lesson time
>> See you on our lesson time.

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