Please check my homework

If someone offerd to give me a free vacation trip, I will go to Hawaii. When I was childhood, I really disliked cold weather so, I wanted to live in Hawaii some day because Hawaii was the most famous vacation spot at that time. Athough I never been to there, I imagined about there that the weather is warm, food is abundant and juicy, people are kind and atmosfere is peaceful. Even though I became to know about other various beautiful places, Hawaii is still remained me my utopia which I want to go most. If I go there, I will stay on beach all day and enjoy my freedom to the fullest.

Hi [이름]^^ I really admire you for sending me your composition. I enjoyed reading it. I also want to visit Hawaii in the future. I am curious about why Hawaii is your utopia? Tell me about it tomorrow.Thank you for your time today. I always look forward to talk to you everyday. Keeo up the good work! See you! Take Care!Have a wonderful day! Teacher Nina Here are my corrections for you: If someone offerd to give me a free vacation trip, I will go to Hawaii. >> If someone offered me to have a free vacation trip, I will go to Hawaii. When I was childhood, I really disliked cold weather so, I wanted to live in Hawaii some day because Hawaii was the most famous vacation spot at that time. >> When I was in my childhood years,I don\'t like cold weather so I wanted to live in Hawaii someday because it was the most famous place to take a vacation at that time. OR >> When I was young,I disliked cold weather so I dreamt of living in Hawaii someday because it was the most famous tourist destination places at that time. Athough I never been to there, I imagined about there that the weather is warm, food is abundant and juicy, people are kind and atmosfere is peaceful. >> Although I never been there,I imagined about the weather is warm,food is abundant and fruits are juicy,people are kind and the atmosphere is peaceful. OR >> Although I\'ve never been to Hawaii,I imagined about the weather is warm,food is abundant,people who lives there are kind and the atmosphere of the place is peaceful; Even though I became to know about other various beautiful places, >> Eventhough I knew a lot about other beautiful places. Hawaii is still remained me my utopia which I want to go most. >> Hawaii still remained as my utopia. OR >> I still want to go to Hawaii,it still remains as my utopia. If I go there, I will stay on beach all day and enjoy my freedom to the fullest. >> If I will go there,I will stay at the beach all day and enjoy my time to the fullest. OR >> If I will go there,I will stay at the beach all day and enjoy my time being free to the fullest.