Please check my interview script

2020-03-24 · 첨삭 강사 Ysabelle

학생이 쓴 원문

Introduction of your School I’m always proud of my school, [이름]dong University. The high-level major classes have taught me the way to study and think logically. The English and computer classes were very advanced, and we used only English in the more t[이름] 70% of the class. I developed a leadership by circle and community services activity. Especially, when I was a member of the [이름]dong Honors Code, I supported to make a unsupervised test policy. My school taught me the importance of love, modesty, and service.

강사 첨삭

Hello there Ken!
T[이름]k you for sending your script.
Overall, I like the answer. 
I think it shows how loyal you are to this university.
Good job! 
Good luck with your interview!

I’m always proud of my school, [이름]dong University. 
>>CORRECT

The high-level major classes have taught me the way to study and think logically. 
>>Their high-level standard classes have taught me the proper way to study and think logically.

The English and computer classes were very advanced, and we used only English in the more t[이름] 70% of the class.
>>The English and computer classes are very advanced and we only use English in more t[이름] 70% of the class.

 I developed a leadership by circle and community services activity. 
>>CORRECT

Especially, when I was a member of the [이름]dong Honors Code, I supported to make a unsupervised test policy. 
>>This happened when I was a member of the [이름]dong Honors Code where I gave my support to make an unsupervised test policy.

My school taught me the importance of love, modesty, and service.
>>CORRECT

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