Rollplay - borrowing MP3

2020-10-20 · 첨삭 강사 Elise

학생이 쓴 원문

Hi Min. This is [이름]. I\'m calling to ask you something. If you don\'t mind, could you lend me your MP3 player for a week? I am going to travel to Busan alone for a week from tomorrow. I want to listen to music on my way there, But unfortunately my MP3 player is broken now somehow. Don\'t worry. I\'m going to take good care of it. I will get it back to you I return. Nice coffee on me. Okay. When to go get it? Alright, thank you very much, Min. I appreciate it. I really do. Hello. It is me, [이름]. I am calling to let you know that I have a problem with the MP3 player you lent me last weekend. The main problem is that I accidently let it fall out of my pocket somehow. The touchscreen got cracked and badly scratched. Furthermore, it doesn\'t seem to be working. What am I supposed to do? I don\'t know what to do. I was wondering if I could buy you a replacement. Can I give you some money for it if you want to buy other one? I would like to know which one is prefer you?

강사 첨삭

You did an awesome job [이름]! Please keep in mind all the corrections I made below. ^^
-Teacher Elise


Hi Min. This is [이름]. I\'m calling to ask you something.
>> CORRECT
If you don\'t mind, could you lend me your MP3 player for a week?
>>CORRECT
I am going to travel to Busan alone for a week from tomorrow.
>> I am going tp travel to Busan alone for a week starting tomorrow. 
I want to listen to music on my way there, But unfortunately my MP3 player is broken now somehow.
>> I want to listen to music on my way there but unfortunately my MP3 player is broken now somehow. 
Don\'t worry. I\'m going to take good care of it. I will get it back to you I return.
>>  Don\'t worry. I\'m going to take good care of it. I will give it back to you when I return.
Nice coffee on me. Okay.
>> Nice! Coffee is on me. Okay.
When to go get it?
>> When can I get it?
Alright, thank you very much, Min. I appreciate it. I really do.
>> Alright. Thank you very much, Min. I appreciate it. I really do. 

--

Hello. It is me, [이름].
>> CORRECT
I am calling to let you know that I have a problem with the MP3 player you lent me last weekend.
>>CORRECT
The main problem is that I accidently let it fall out of my pocket somehow.
>>CORRECT
 The touchscreen got cracked and badly scratched.
>>The screen got cracked and badly scratched. 
Furthermore, it doesn\'t seem to be working. 
>> CORRECT
What am I supposed to do? I don\'t know what to do.
>>CORRECT
I was wondering if I could buy you a replacement. 
>>CORRECT
Can I give you some money for it if you want to buy other one?
>>CORRECT
I would like to know which one is prefer you?
>> I would like to know which one you prefer.

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