Serious relationship or money.

2021-04-14 · 첨삭 강사 Oneil

학생이 쓴 원문

I would choose a person with no serious relationship. Why people need serious relationship. My idea is that people want to spend time with fun and meaningful. If I have enough money, I can do. These days, there are plenty of contents.I can enjoy with money. If necessary, I can gather people to play with me. As well, lots of people need money to save something precious. I will help them. I can make enough meaningful situations. If I am a rich person, I would go to travel around world. And I will find out people who needs my help. If you watch a movie Star Wars, You will know. The serious relationship make me unstable.

강사 첨삭

I wouI would choose a person with no serious relationship.ld choose a person with no serious relationship.
>> I would choose a person with no serious relationship.

 Why people need serious relationship. 
>>  Why do people need serious relationships?
 
My idea is that people want to spend time with fun and meaningful.
>> My idea is that people want to spend time with fun and meaningful time with each other.
 
 If I have enough money, I can do. These days, there are plenty of contents.
>>  If I have enough money, I can do it. These days, there are plenty of things to be considered. 
 
I can enjoy with money.
>> I can enjoy by myself with my money.
 
 If necessary, I can gather people to play with me. 
>> Correct.
 
As well, lots of people need money to save something precious. 
>> At the same time, lots of people need money to save something precious in their lives. 
 
I will help them. 
>> Correct.
 
I can make enough meaningful situations. 
>> Correct.
 
If I am a rich person, I would go to travel around world. 
>> If I am a rich person, I would go travel around the world. 
 
And I will find out people who needs my help.
>> And I will find people who need my help.
 
 If you watch a movie Star Wars, You will know. 
>>  If you watch the movie, \"Star Wars\", you will know. 
 
The serious relationship make me unstable.
>> Serious relationships make me unstable.
 

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