Sermon 2

2021-11-14 · 첨삭 강사 Faith

학생이 쓴 원문

And now he in rests from his labor. What he has done was that he has kept his eyes on Jesus. He was one of the pioneers in our faith journey. I had begun our communal faith journey ahead of us. He must have had challenges and difficulties. He must have experienced cumbersome and burden. But he never quitted. He has kept his eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Now we believe that he is with Jesus Christ. He is in a better place where there is no pain, no grief and no sorrow. That is our belief. How can it be possible? How do we know it? What is the proof? According to today’s scripture, we, human beings, are not able to redeem ourselves. It is because of our sins that we have committed in our lives. Christ made a sacrifice on the cross for our sins, and that was it! He obeyed God’s will and plan for salvation. He rose again from the grave and sat down right beside God. It was a perfect sacrifice by a perfect person to perfect some very imperfect people.

강사 첨삭

I praise God for this wonderful message of yours, Han! One more to go!-Faith-
And now he in rests from his labor. 
>> And now he is resting from his labor. 
What he has done was that he has kept his eyes on Jesus. 
>> What he did was that he had kept his eyes on Jesus. 
He was one of the pioneers in our faith journey. 
>> CORRECT
I had begun our communal faith journey ahead of us. 
>> He had begun our communal faith journey ahead of us. 
He must have had challenges and difficulties. 
>> He must had challenges and difficulties. 
He must have experienced cumbersome and burden. 
>> He must had experienced cumbersome situations and burdens. 
But he never quitted. 
>> But he never quit. 
He has kept his eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in.
>> He had kept his eyes on Jesus, who both began and will finish this race we’re in.
Now we believe that he is with Jesus Christ. 
>> Now, we believe that he is with Jesus Christ. 
He is in a better place where there is no pain, no grief and no sorrow. 
>> CORRECT
That is our belief.
>> CORRECT
How can it be possible? 
>> CORRECT
How do we know it? 
>> How do we know about it?
What is the proof?
>> CORRECT
According to today’s scripture, we, human beings, are not able to redeem ourselves. 
>> CORRECT
It is because of our sins that we have committed in our lives.
>> It is because of the sins that we have committed in our lives.
Christ made a sacrifice on the cross for our sins, and that was it! 
>> CORRECT
OR Christ laid down Himself on the cross for our sins, and that was it! 
He obeyed God’s will and plan for salvation. 
>> CORRECT
He rose again from the grave and sat down right beside God. 
>> CORRECT 
It was a perfect sacrifice by a perfect person to perfect some very imperfect people.
>> It was a perfect sacrifice by a perfect Person for very imperfect people.
OR It was a perfect sacrifice by a perfect Person for perfectly imperfect people.

파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.

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