Short essay, June 6 2015

2015-06-08 · 첨삭 강사 Venus

학생이 쓴 원문

My first essay to present my feeling in today's article. Unification can be a solution to improve human right of North Korea and I don't have any doubt that it will make Korea more strong. But, we must consider the crisis after unification. Germany have already experienced the crisis due to the economy and system imbalance between east and west Germany. We should learn a lesson from Germany's case and don't avoid making same mistake. -James

강사 첨삭

Hello James!

Wow, I\'m shocked^^. I\'m glad you made an essay. Some reminders:

1. Don\'t forget your verb.
example: My first essay is to present my feeling in today\'s article.

2. Subject-verb Agreement
example: Germany has already experienced the crisis due to the economy and system imbalance between East and West Germany.

3. Be clear
example: We should learn a lesson from Germany\'s case and avoid making the same mistake.

Teacher Venus^^


My first essay to present my feeling in today\'s article.
>>>My first essay is to present my feeling in today\'s article.

Unification can be a solution to improve human right of North Korea and I don\'t have any doubt that it will make Korea more strong.
>>>Unification can be a solution to improve human rights of North Korea and I don\'t have any doubt that it will make Korea stronger.

But, we must consider the crisis after unification.
>>>CORRECT

Germany have already experienced the crisis due to the economy and system imbalance between east and west Germany.
>>>Germany has already experienced the crisis due to the economy and system imbalance between East and West Germany.

We should learn a lesson from Germany\'s case and don\'t avoid making same mistake.
>>>We should learn a lesson from Germany\'s case and avoid making the same mistake.

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