Should parents focus more on giving children freedom or strict guidance?
학생이 쓴 원문
I think parents should balance between freedom and strict guidance on their childern. However, it\'s too difficult. If parents give to childern too much freedom, then it is possible that children choose bad way like booling. Therefore, the minimum guidence what they haven\'t do is necessary. But if the guidence is going more strict, children also choose the bad way due to rebellious spirit. Balancing their attitude is a lifelong homework for parents.
강사 첨삭
Hi, Mary! Your ideas were thoughtful and well-developed, especially your point about the importance of balance in parenting. You showed good awareness of how too much freedom or too much strictness can both lead to problems. Just be careful with grammar, spelling, and sentence structure so your ideas come across more clearly. Keep practicing, your reasoning is strong, and with cleaner sentences, your writing will become even more effective.
-Teacher Wela
I think parents should balance between freedom and strict guidance on their childern.
>> I think parents should balance freedom and strict guidance for their children.
If parents give to childern too much freedom, then it is possible that children choose bad way like booling.
>> If parents give their children too much freedom, it’s possible that they may choose a wrong path, such as bullying.
Therefore, the minimum guidence what they haven\'t do is necessary.
Therefore, the minimum guidence what they haven\'t do is necessary.
>> Therefore, a minimum level of guidance about what they should not do is necessary.
But if the guidence is going more strict, children also choose the bad way due to rebellious spirit.
>> But if the guidance becomes too strict, children may also choose the wrong path out of rebellion.
Balancing their attitude is a lifelong homework for parents.
>> Finding the right balance is a lifelong challenge for parents.
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