State of interest #4
학생이 쓴 원문
It is a great honor for me to apply for the Master of Science in Urban and Regional Planning at the Alberta Graduate School and to provide you with information on my background knowledge and preparation.
I have gained solid competence and experience in the field of railways construction concerning research policy and planning. I\'m a transportation engineer specialized in demand forecasting, economic analysis and feasibility studies on railway construction at Korea National Railway.
I started my career at KR as a civil engineer in 2006. And then, for over a decade of working on the railway policy and planning departments of Korea National Railway(KR), I was responsible for the 2nd and 3rd master Plans of Railway Development. I also supported establishing the Basic Plan of the Seoul metropolitan High-Speed Railway opened in January 2014.
강사 첨삭
Here\'s your 4th edited composition, [이름]!
Cheers,
Jean~~
It is a great honor for me to apply for the Master of Science in Urban and Regional Planning at the Alberta Graduate School and to provide you with information on my background knowledge and preparation. I have gained solid competence and experience in the field of railways construction concerning research policy and planning.
>> correct
I\'m a transportation engineer specialized in demand forecasting, economic analysis and feasibility studies on railway construction at Korea National Railway.
>> I\'m a transportation engineer that has specialized in demand forecasting, economic analysis, and feasibility studies on railway construction at Korea National Railway (KR).
I started my career at KR as a civil engineer in 2006. And then, for over a decade of working on the railway policy and planning departments of Korea National Railway(KR), I was responsible for the 2nd and 3rd master Plans of Railway Development.
>> I started my career at KR as a civil engineer in 2006, and for over a decade of working on the railway policy and planning departments of my company, I was responsible for the 2nd and 3rd master Plans of Railway Development. [I\'m assuming that these are all in the past and have nothing to do with your current role, projects, or responsibilities. Otherwise, check the edited version below.]
>> I started my career at KR as a civil engineer in 2006, and for over a decade of working on the railway policy and planning departments of my company, I\'ve been responsible for the 2nd and 3rd master Plans of Railway Development. [This is under the assumption that the project is current.]
I also supported establishing the Basic Plan of the Seoul metropolitan High-Speed Railway opened in January 2014.
>> I also supported the establishment of the Basic Plan of the Seoul metropolitan High-Speed Railway, which opened in January 2014.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.