Summary

2014-04-02 · 첨삭 강사 Kathrine

학생이 쓴 원문

The First opinion speaker said that the quality of his life is worsening. Even though material wealth have been growing as the economy expanded. I think she does not put the money as one of her terms of a quality life. He insist that quality of life is strongly related with our environmental concern, such as stress, creme rates, education, etc. I totally agree with his opinion. I would like to give you Korea situation as a good example. The Korea economic has grown rapidly for the last three dacades. That means the wealth of life better that before arguably. But, Unfortunately, The suicide rate also have been increasing at the same time. Why so many people choose to abandon their life despite of their better wealth condition. As first opinion speaker said, The mental issue is one of the main factors for the quality of our life. The quality of life never be masured by material wealth.

강사 첨삭

Hello there again Mr. [Name]!
Wow, you are really ahead of our topic.
You are really doing what you have said that you will prepare for the discussions that we are going to have.
That\'s good and that is sincere enough.

keep up then the good work.

See you again tomorrow!
Enjoy the rest of the day!
Take care!

Always,
Kathrine ^^

The First opinion speaker said that the quality of his life is worsening.

>> correct!
Even though material wealth have been growing as the economy expanded.

>> Even though material wealth is growing as the economy is expanding.
I think she does not put the money as one of her terms of a quality life.
>> I think that she does not put money as one of her terms of having a good quality of e.
He insist that quality of life is strongly related with our environmental concern, such as stress, creme rates, education, etc.
>> She insisted that the quality of life is strongly related with our environmental concerns, such as stress, crime rates, education, etc.
I totally agree with his opinion.

>> correct!

I would like to give you Korea situation as a good example.

>> I would like to give Korea\'s situation as an example.
The Korea economic has grown rapidly for the last three dacades.

>> The Korean economy is growing rapidly for the past 3 decades.
That means the wealth of life better that before arguably.

>>  That means that the quality of life is arguably better than before.
But, Unfortunately, The suicide rate also have been increasing at the same time.
>>  But unfortunately, the suicide rate has also been increasing at the same time.
Why so many people choose to abandon their life despite of their better wealth condition.
>>  correct!

>> or: Why so many people choose to end their life despite of having a better life condition.
As first opinion speaker said, The mental issue is one of the main factors for the quality of our life.

>> correct!
The quality of life never be masured by material wealth.

>> The quality of life can never be measured by the material wealth that we have.

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