Television introduces violence to young children. Do you agree or disagree?
학생이 쓴 원문
Actually, TV shows many violence scenes. Even though TV marks ages; All, 12, 15, or 19, young children can access easily anytime. Sometimes parents control their children, but they can not watch their children all the time. Broadcast stations introduce too many violences to young children thru game program or variety show. It must be harmful to young children. TV programs should be considered violence.
강사 첨삭
Hello [이름]!
I totally agree with your ideas. The TV can truly be a source of negative influences to children. Looking forward to reading more of your writing. See you later! ^^
~~Teacher Kate
>>Actually, the TV shows many violent scenes.
2. Even though TV marks ages; All, 12, 15, or 19, young children can access easily anytime.
>>Even though some TV programs set age restrictions, young children can access them easily anytime.
3. Sometimes parents control their children, but they can not watch their children all the time.
>> CORRECT!
4. Broadcast stations introduce too many violences to young children thru game program or variety show.
>>Broadcast stations introduce too much violence to young children thru game program or variety shows.
5. It must be harmful to young children.
>>CORRECT!
6. TV programs should be considered violence.
>>Some TV programs should be considered violent.
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