The diagram illustrates how bees produce honey. (Summarize the information by selecting and reportin

2021-03-09 · 첨삭 강사 Donna

학생이 쓴 원문

This diagram shows seven main steps that how bees make honey. The process starts to build up hive by honey bees, and ends when the honey is collected. First, the bees make hive to stock nectar in there, which is composed many hexagon shaped cells. Next, the bees from hive fly to find flower to collect nectar from it. They carry nectar to hive for producing honey. First of all, the bees put nectar into the cells and then wings to make wind. This step is needed for cooling hive and evaporate water. After these processes are finished the hive is filled honey and can be used for eating.

강사 첨삭

Hi there Young Won!

Thanks for creating your own answer. I know that there\'s a sample answer on this task and I hope it guided you well to see the logic and transitional words better.

Let\'s discuss it further in class in a few.

See you soon!

-T. Donna =) 

This diagram shows seven main steps that how bees make honey. The process starts to build up hive by honey bees, and ends when the honey is collected.
>> This diagram shows the seven main steps on how bees make honey. The process starts by build up the hive by the honey bees and ends when the honey is collected.

First, the bees make hive to stock nectar in there, which is composed many hexagon shaped cells. Next, the bees from hive fly to find flower to collect nectar from it.
>> First, the bees make a hive to stock the nectar there which is composed of many hexagon-shaped cells. Next, the bees from the hive fly to find a flower to collect nectar from it.

They carry nectar to hive for producing honey. First of all, the bees put nectar into the cells and then wings to make wind. This step is needed for cooling hive and evaporate water. After these processes are finished the hive is filled honey and can be used for eating.
>> They carry the nectar to hive to produce honey. The bees put nectar into the cells first and then their wings blow wind. This step is needed for cooling the hive and evaporating the water. After these processes are finished, the hive is filled with honey and can be used for eating.


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