[The most recent trip / Unforgettable trip]
학생이 쓴 원문
[Q] The most recent trip
Oh my God, it\'s been 4 years since I recently traveled.
I don\'t remember much, but I\'ll talking about it.
My last overseas travel destination was Guam.
By the way, there is not much to say. Because I got off at the airport and went to Guam PIC. And just played in the water for 3 days. Since the children were young(3 and 5), I only had a hard memory to play with them. That\'s all I remember about the my most recent trip.
[Q] Unforgettable trip
About 15 years ago, I went to Japan in my late 20s. I really liked snowboarding, so I went to Nagano, Japan, where the Winter Olympics were held. Oh my god, my back was hurt the first day I went to the ski resort. I almost crawled for 3 days. I didn\'t even get on my favorite snowboard and had to return to Korea. That was my worst trip.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]! This was a great essay although I need you to focus more on you sentence construction and usage of your punctuations marks. Keep up the good work. :)
-Teacher Elise
>>Oh my goodness, it\'s been 4 years since I traveled.
I don\'t remember much, but I\'ll talking about it.
>>I don\'t remember much, but I\'ll share what I remember.
My last overseas travel destination was Guam.
>>My last overseas travel destination was Guam.
By the way, there is not much to say. Because I got off at the airport and went to Guam PIC.
>>There\'s not much to say because when I got out of the airport and I went to Guam PIC.
And just played in the water for 3 days.
>>I played in the water for 3 days.
Since the children were young(3 and 5), I only had a hard memory to play with them.
>>My children were very young then. Their ages were 3yrs. old and 5yrs. old.
That\'s all I remember about the my most recent trip.
>>I only had a brief memory about the trip.
--
About 15 years ago, I went to Japan in my late 20s.
>> CORRECT
I really liked snowboarding, so I went to Nagano, Japan, where the Winter Olympics were held.
>> CORRECT
Oh my god, my back was hurt the first day I went to the ski resort.
>> Oh my God, my back hurt the first day I went to the ski resort.
I almost crawled for 3 days.
>>CORRECT
I didn\'t even get on my favorite snowboard and had to return to Korea.
>> CORRECT
That was my worst trip.
>>CORRECT
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