To Irene, homework from yesterday's class.
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: World history suggests that violence and conflict were more evident under male leadership than under female leadership. So, for peace to prevail, female leadership can be considered as a better option than male leadership. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
My answer>
I disagree with it. I think there are two matters we should consider. One is the society in which what kinds of ideology dominate it. The other is a question, is it really about sexual matters?
Most countries have had patriarchal characteristics. Men are more likely to be a leader or one of his supporters than women in the society. And think about what citizens expect them to do. They are expected to be robust and not to hesitate to make decisions. It's the concept of gender, not sex. They do their roles considered proper ways in the society. So, things will be different depending on how much these two drivers affect the countries, the ideology and the gender concept.
강사 첨삭
Happy Monday Sunnie! Thanks for sending your composition. I appreciate your tenacity in practicing English.
~T. Irene~
ESSAY: World history suggests that violence and conflict were more evident under male leadership than under female leadership. So, for peace to prevail, female leadership can be considered as a better option than male leadership. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
My answer>
I disagree with it.
>>> Correct.
I think there are two matters we should consider.
>>> I think there are two main reasons for this that we should consider.
One is the society in which what kinds of ideology dominate it.
>>> One is the ideology that dominates the society.
The other is a question, is it really about sexual matters?
>>> The other is a question of sexuality.
Most countries have had patriarchal characteristics.
>>> Most countries have had patriarchal culture.
Men are more likely to be a leader or one of his supporters than women in the society.
>>> Men are more likely to be the leaders of their society than women.
And think about what citizens expect them to do.
>>> It is the role that is mostly expected from them.
They are expected to be robust and not to hesitate to make decisions.
>>> People believe that men are strong and good in making sound decisions.
It\'s the concept of gender, not sex.
>>> Correct.
They do their roles considered proper ways in the society.
>>> They do/complete their roles as considered proper by the society.
So, things will be different depending on how much these two drivers affect the countries, the ideology and the gender concept.
>>> So, things differ depending on how these two drivers, the ideology and the gender concept, affect the country.
~T. Irene~
ESSAY: World history suggests that violence and conflict were more evident under male leadership than under female leadership. So, for peace to prevail, female leadership can be considered as a better option than male leadership. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
My answer>
I disagree with it.
>>> Correct.
I think there are two matters we should consider.
>>> I think there are two main reasons for this that we should consider.
One is the society in which what kinds of ideology dominate it.
>>> One is the ideology that dominates the society.
The other is a question, is it really about sexual matters?
>>> The other is a question of sexuality.
Most countries have had patriarchal characteristics.
>>> Most countries have had patriarchal culture.
Men are more likely to be a leader or one of his supporters than women in the society.
>>> Men are more likely to be the leaders of their society than women.
And think about what citizens expect them to do.
>>> It is the role that is mostly expected from them.
They are expected to be robust and not to hesitate to make decisions.
>>> People believe that men are strong and good in making sound decisions.
It\'s the concept of gender, not sex.
>>> Correct.
They do their roles considered proper ways in the society.
>>> They do/complete their roles as considered proper by the society.
So, things will be different depending on how much these two drivers affect the countries, the ideology and the gender concept.
>>> So, things differ depending on how these two drivers, the ideology and the gender concept, affect the country.
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