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학생이 쓴 원문
2/7
Task 1
First of all, The graphs show that the most popular feature of a mobile phone is making calls in 2006, 2008, and 2010. In 2010, a bit of decline happened in the percentage. But it is clear that making a call is a priority function of a mobile phone.
Secondly, percentages of taking photos, searching the internet, playing music, and recording video increased noticeably. These features are directly connected to the development of technology. For example, There was no data about percentages of searching the internet and recording video in 2006. But in 2008, the percentages can be found on the grpahs, which means emergence of technology related to the features. In addition, the percentage of playing game was explicitly increased. This can be explained with rapid improvement of the phone\'s function.
Task2
Writing Exercise: Some people enjoy change, and they look forward to new experiences. Others like their lives to stay the same, and they do not change their usual
강사 첨삭
Hi Louie!
For Task 1, you need to focus on the information presented.
You can\'t make your own theories and inferences.
Stick to the facts that are shown.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
First of all, The graphs show that the most popular feature of a mobile phone is making calls in 2006, 2008, and 2010.
>> The table shows that the most popular feature of a mobile phone is making calls in 2006, 2008, and 2010.
In 2010, a bit of decline happened in the percentage.
>> In 2010, there was a bit of decline in the percentage.
But it is clear that making a call is a priority function of a mobile phone.
>> However, it is clear that making a call is a priority function of a mobile phone.
Secondly, percentages of taking photos, searching the internet, playing music, and recording video increased noticeably.
>> Secondly, percentages of taking photos, searching the internet, playing music, and recording videos increased noticeably.
These features are directly connected to the development of technology.
>> Correct
For example, There was no data about percentages of searching the internet and recording video in 2006.
>> For example, there was no data on the percentages of searching the internet and recording videos in 2006.
But in 2008, the percentages can be found on the grpahs, which means emergence of technology related to the features.
>> But in 2008, the percentages were shown in the table, which means the emergence of technology related to the features.
In addition, the percentage of playing game was explicitly increased.
>> In addition, the percentage of playing games has explicitly increased.
This can be explained with rapid improvement of the phone\'s function.
>> This can be explained by the rapid improvement of the phone\'s function.
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