Vips

I went to Vips with my friend yesterday. Vips is one of famous family restaurants and it is expensive. so i can't go there very often. there is Vips near my workplace. one of my co-workers said they offer ribs for free now. when i heard that, i really wanted to go there. so i called my friend and she came to me after work. eventhough it isn't weekend, there were many people there. because students had a university entrance exam yesterday so they enjoyed having dinner there. we waited for 30 minutes. i was dying of hungry.

HI [이름],   It's nice to see your message here. Anyway here is your composition correction.   I went to Vips with my friend yesterday. -- >>>this is a correct sentence or you may also say Yesterday I went to Vips with my friend.   Vips is one of famous family restaurants and it is expensive . so i can't go there very often. -- Vips is one of the famous family restaurants here in Korea and it is really expensive, so I don't go there often.   there is Vips near my workplace. one of my co-workers said they offer ribs for free now. when i heard that, i really wanted to go there. so i called my friend and she came to me after work. - There is Vips near my workplace, one of my co-workers informed me that they offer ribs for free now so  since I really like to go there I invited my friend  to go there after our work.   eventhough it isn't weekend, there were many people there because students had a university entrance exam yesterday so they enjoyed having dinner there. we waited for 30 minutes. i was dying of hungry.   -- It isn't a weekend however there were many people  because a lot of students had their University exam so they enjoyed eating there after the test. We waited for thirty minutes, I was dying of hunger.   Here is the complete corrected composition: Yesterday I went to Vips with my friend.  Vips is one of the famous family restaurants here in Korea and it is really expensive, so I don't go there often. There is Vips near my workplace, one of my co-workers informed me that they offer ribs for free now so  since I really like to go there I invited my friend  to go after our work. It isn't a weekend however there were many people  because a lot of students had their University exam so they enjoyed eating there after the test. We waited for thirty minutes, I was dying of hunger.     I HOPE YOU ENJOYED EATING AT VIPS I'M PRETTY SURE YOU ATE DELICIOUS FOODS. YUMMY!   I'LL LOOK FORWARD TO RECEIVE A MESSAGE AGAIN FOR YOU.   ALWAYS TAKE CARE.