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2011-08-03 · 첨삭 강사 camille

학생이 쓴 원문

I spent this summer holiday in Manila. and It was great. In the morning, we slept because of heavy drinking the night before After waking up, we went to huge shopping malls like SM mall. We also met some friends there. Whlie walking on the street near our hotel, I found some beautiful women. and I asked them to join our party. so we threw a party in our hotel. I also ate some delicious food in sea side market. We bought seafoods like shrimps and lobster and took them to the restaurant for cooking. I had them be cooked with chilly sauce, and it was amazingly delicious.

강사 첨삭

Hello there my dear [이름],

Thank you so much for dropping in your composition.:)

Im glad to hear that you enjoyed your stay here in the Philippines.

Talk to you again my dear..

T.Camille

 

I spent this summer holiday in Manila.

>> Correct

and It was great.

>> Correct

In the morning, we slept because of heavy drinking the night before.

>> Correct

>>We slept at daytime because of hangover.

After waking up, we went to a huge shopping malls like SM mall.

>> Correct

We also met some friends there. 

>> Correct

Whlie walking on the street near our hotel, I found some beautiful women.

>> While walking on the street near our hotel, I saw some beautiful women.

and I asked them to join our party. so we threw a party in our hotel.

>> Correct

I also ate some delicious food in a sea side market.

>> Correct

We bought sea foods like shrimps and lobster and took them to the restaurant for cooking.

>> correct

I had them be cooked with chilly sauce, and it was amazingly delicious.

>>I had them cooked in chili sauce, and it was amazingly delicious!

 

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