What are some of the negative effects of alcohol?

2022-08-08 · 첨삭 강사 Camille

학생이 쓴 원문

There are so many negative effects of alcohol. First, Alcohol makes your brain to be old quickly. Our brain needs a lots of waters, but alcohol takes waters from brains. Second, I have too much foods while drinking alcohol. So, I have worried obesity. Third, If I drink too much alcohol, I suffer hangover. I have known things of negative effects of alcohol, but I don\'t know that why I drink alcohol a lot.

강사 첨삭

Good day, Sir [이름]ny!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

There are so many negative effects of alcohol. 
>> CORRECT!
First, Alcohol makes your brain to be old quickly. 
>> CORRECT!
Our brain needs a lots of waters, but alcohol takes waters from brains. 
>> Our brain needs a lot of water, but alcohol takes the water from our brains. 
OR >> Our brain needs  enough water, but alcohol takes the water from our brains. 
Second, I have too much foods while drinking alcohol. 
>> Second, I have too much food while drinking alcohol. 
OR >> Second, I eat too much food while drinking alcohol. 
So, I have worried obesity. 
>> So, I am worried about obesity. 
Third, If I drink too much alcohol, I suffer hangover. 
>> Third, If I drink too much alcohol, I suffer from hangover. 
I have known things of negative effects of alcohol, but I don\'t know that why I drink alcohol a lot.
>> I have known things of negative effects of alcohol, but I don\'t know why I drink alcohol a lot.

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