What are some things that make you happy?

2022-07-14 · 첨삭 강사 Kristine

학생이 쓴 원문

There are many things that make me happy in my life. First of all, my pet who name is LEON. When he first came to my house, he was an abandoned dog. So, at first, he was really shy and didn’t eat or walk well. However, our family keep care of him with warm heart, he became more energetic and outgoing dog. So my dog is one of my happy things. Second, my friends make me happy. I really like meet and being with others. So whenever I meet and communicate with my friends, I feel happy and have fun. Finally, delicious foods make me happy. I think most people also think about that, when people eat delicious foods or desserts, they relieve stress easily. Especially in these days, my favorite food is chicken with beer. The combination of chicken and beer is fantastic. So, my dog, friends and delicious foods make me happy in my life.

강사 첨삭

Happy Thursday, [이름]! 

Thank you so much for doing your homework. We have a dog too. We treat her like a princess because she’s already part of our family. Tell me more about your dog next time!

 

-Kristine ^^


There are many things that make me happy in my life.

>> There are many things that make my life happy.
First of all, my pet who name is LEON.

>> First of all, my pet’s name is Leon.
When he first came to my house, he was an abandoned dog.

>> He was an abandoned dog when he first came to my house.
So, at first, he was really shy and didn’t eat or walk well.

>> At first, he was really shy and wasn’t eating or walking well.
However, our family keep care of him with warm heart,

>> However, my family loves him and takes good care of him.

he became more energetic and outgoing dog.

>> He became more energetic and an outing dog.

So my dog is one of my happy things.

>> My dog is one of the things that make me happy.
Second, my friends make me happy.

>> The second thing that makes me happy, are my friends.
I really like meet and being with others.

>> I really like meeting and hanging out with them.
So whenever I meet and communicate with my friends, I feel happy and have fun.

>> I feel great whenever I talk to my friends.
Finally, delicious foods make me happy.

>> Finally, delicious foods make me happy.
I think most people also think about that,

>> I think most people think that way too.

when people eat delicious foods or desserts, they relieve stress easily.

>> Eating delicious foods or desserts can reduce your stress.
Especially in these days, my favorite food is chicken with beer.

>> I like eating chicken while drinking beers these days.
The combination of chicken and beer is fantastic.

>> Correct.
So, my dog, friends and delicious foods make me happy in my life.

>> Therefore, my dog, my friends, and delicious foods make my life happy. 



파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.

다른 영어첨삭교정 보기

영어첨삭교정 ·