What are three things that motivate you?

2021-11-05 · 첨삭 강사 Debbie

학생이 쓴 원문

I think the first thing that motivates me is my parents, they are very important to me. They always support and give me the best thing they have. Because of them I always make an effort with my major and my work although it\'s very hard for me. And the second thing maybe is money. If I have money, I can do everything I am interested in like traveling, shopping,... as well as I can take care of my parents and help other people who aren\'t in good condition. The final thing is my passion for the network system. I feel excited when I\'m learning new things about network systems.

강사 첨삭

Hi, [이름]! Thank you for taking the time to do your homework.  You have answered the question appropriately. However, please use proper punctuation marks for your sentences.


- Debbie

I think the first thing that motivates me is my parents, they are very important to me. 
>> I think my parents motivate me. They are very important to me.

They always support and give me the best thing they have. 
>> This is a good sentence.

Because of them I always make an effort with my major and my work although it\'s very hard for me. 
>> Because of them, I always made an effort at school and now at work, although it\'s very hard for me.

And the second thing maybe is money. 
>> The second thing  that motivates me is money.

If I have money, I can do everything I am interested in like traveling, shopping,... as well as I can take care of my parents and help other people who aren\'t in good condition.
>>  If I have money, I can do everything I am interested in, like traveling, shopping, taking care of my parents, and helping other people who aren\'t doing well.

The final thing is my passion for the network system.
>> The final thing that motivates me is my passion for the network system.

 I feel excited when I\'m learning new things about network systems.
>> I feel excited when I learn new things about network systems.

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