What do you think of the idea that people have the right to do whatever they want with their bodies?

2019-12-13 · 첨삭 강사 Lucy

학생이 쓴 원문

I agree that we have the right to do whatever we want with our bodies. But, if it is illegal, we don’t have to do that. We have two reason why we don’t do that. First, we belong to the community. We make the regulation called the law to live together and to maintain the peace and order. If some people didn’t follow the rules, the society will be mess and confused soon. Also, we don’t have the right to violate the other people’ right. My right is very important and other’s also. We have to protect each other. For example, we can take drugs with our bodies by ourselves. It is not problem because it affect only our bodies. But, drug make other crimes like violation. It affect other peoples who don’t take the drugs. So, our society prohibit to take the drugs and we should follow the law. Although we have the right to do anything in our bodies, we can’t do everything as we want. Because we have the duty to follow the rules and not to violate other people’s right.

강사 첨삭

Thank you Se [이름]!


~Teacher Lucy


I agree that we have the right to do whatever we want with our bodies.

>>CORRECT!

>>I admit that we have the authority to do whatever we want with our bodies.

 But, if it is illegal, we don’t have to do that.

>>CORRECT!

>>But, if it\'s banned, then let\'s have to follow it.

 We have two reason why we don’t do that.

>> We have two reasons why we don’t do that.

 First, we belong to the community.

>>CORRECT!

>>Primarily, we belong to certain community.


We make the regulation called the law to live together and to maintain the peace and order.

>>CORRECT!


 If some people didn’t follow the rules, the society will be mess and confused soon.

>>CORRECT!

>>The society will be messed up if some won\'t follow.

 Also, we don’t have the right to violate the other people’ right.

>>Also, we don’t have the right to violate the other people’s right.


 My right is very important and other’s also.

>>CORRECT!

>>My right is important and so as them.


 We have to protect each other.

>>CORRECT!

 For example, we can take drugs with our bodies by ourselves.

>>CORRECT!


 It is not problem because it affect only our bodies.

>>It is not problem because it affects only our bodies.


But, drug make other crimes like violation.

>>But, drug makes other crimes like violation.


It affect other peoples who don’t take the drugs.

>>It affects other people who don’t take the drugs.


So, our society prohibit to take the drugs and we should follow the law.

>>CORRECT!

 Although we have the right to do anything in our bodies, we can’t do everything as we want.

>>CORRECT!


Because we have the duty to follow the rules and not to violate other people’s right.

>> Because we have a duty to follow the rules and not to violate other people’s rights.

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