what faters

2020-10-12 · 첨삭 강사 Jasper

학생이 쓴 원문

When I studied in college, I had a fantasy about my job. My [이름]d had changed as I had graduated. I tried to get a salary or a job that other people would recognize than a dream. I got to think a lot about my dream job and reality. I am still not sure what`s important when choosing a job. It`s good to follow my dreams, though. Basically, I thought I had to have an income to maintain my daily life. Then the working and co-worker and my aptitude.

강사 첨삭

Hello Mrs. [Name]! Thank you for doing your homework. You did great and please keep up the good work. You\'ve improved a lot. 
-T. Jasper

Here are your corrections:

When I studied in college, I had a fantasy about my job.
>> When I was studying in college, I dreamed about my job.

My [이름]d had changed as I had graduated.
>> My [이름]d changed when I graduated.

I tried to get a salary or a job that other people would recognize than a dream.
>> I got a job that other people would recognize instead of my dream job.

I got to think a lot about my dream job and reality.
>> I thought about my dream job and real job.

I am still not sure what`s important when choosing a job.
>> CORRECT

It`s good to follow my dreams, though.
>> It\'s good to follow my drea[이름]

Basically, I thought I had to have an income to maintain my daily life.
>> Basically, I thought I need an income to live my daily life.

Then the working and co-worker and my aptitude.
>> Also, working with co-workers and my aptitude should be thought of.

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