What is the implication of having an aging population?
학생이 쓴 원문
In my opinion, there are two reasons.
First, these days medical technology is developed than the past.
It can be fix most disease that people be ill. People just go to hospital when they are sick.
Second, there are not the situation that people are threatened with their life like war or starvation than the past.
Because of these reasons, aging population is increasing continues.
강사 첨삭
Thank you So [이름]!
In my opinion, there are two reasons.
>>> correct
First, these days medical technology is developed than the past.
First, these days medical technology is developed than the past.
>>> First, these days, medical technology is more developed than in the past.
It can be fix most disease that people be ill.
It can be fix most disease that people be ill.
>>> It can mostly cure and treat diseases when people are ill.
People just go to hospital when they are sick.
>>> correct
Second, there are not the situation that people are threatened with their life like war or starvation than the past.
Second, there are not the situation that people are threatened with their life like war or starvation than the past.
>>> Second, there are no situations which people are threatened with their lives like war or starvation as in the past.
Because of these reasons, aging population is increasing continues.
>>> Because of these reasons, the aging population is continuously increasing.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.