What is your favorite place in your city and why?
학생이 쓴 원문
My favorite place is Nam-san, the mountain located in the middle of Seoul, the capital city of Korea. The height is 262 meters tall, it commands a fine city view, and it’s easy to get there from anywhere in Seoul. In addition, we can enjoy distinctive four seasons all around the year, so it seems new to me every time I visit there. During rising virus affection, only way to work out is to walk outside, and I started trekking up Namsan every day. It has been almost more than 6months up to now.
In spring, there were cherry blossoms, green leaves, and green grasses, in summer, I can see high, blue, and clear sky and lots of flowers blooms, and autumn is near, so now Namsan is changing such as leaves becoming red and yellow and winding much cool air.
Since I trekked up Namsan, I feel like getting in good health physically and mentally. In case of the mental, I forget everything while I trek up that mountain, and physically I can burn useless fat. I have lots of benefit from Namsan.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]! ^^
That sounds like a very interesting place. I hope I can visit there someday. Thanks for sharing :)
My favorite place is Nam-san, the mountain located in the middle of Seoul, the capital city of Korea.
>> My favorite place is Nam-san, the mountain located in the middle of Seoul.
The height is 262 meters tall, it commands a fine city view, and it’s easy to get there from anywhere in Seoul.
>> The mountain is 262 meters tall. It commands a fine city view, and it’s easy to get there from anywhere in Seoul.
In addition, we can enjoy distinctive four seasons all around the year, so it seems new to me every time I visit there.
>> CORRECT
During rising virus affection, only way to work out is to walk outside, and I started trekking up Namsan every day.
>> Ever since the pandemic, the only way to work out is walking outside. I started trekking up Namsan every day.
It has been almost more than 6months up to now.
>> It has been almost more than 6months now.
In spring, there were cherry blossoms, green leaves, and green grasses, in summer, I can see high, blue, and clear sky and lots of flowers blooms, and autumn is near, so now Namsan is changing such as leaves becoming red and yellow and winding much cool air.
>>In spring, there are cherry blossoms, green leaves, and green grass. While on summer, I can see high, blue, and clear sky and a lot of flowers blooming. On the other hand, autumn is near so now the color of the leaves are changing in Namsan.
Since I trekked up Namsan, I feel like getting in good health physically and mentally.
>> Since I trekked up Namsan, I feel like my body is getting healthy physically and mentally.
In case of the mental, I forget everything while I trek up that mountain, and physically I can burn useless fat.
>> In terms of my mental health, trekking releases my stress and physically, it can burn fat.
I have lots of benefit from Namsan.
>> There are a lot of benefits when you go yo Namsan.
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