What is your opinion of gender equality?

2019-10-17 · 첨삭 강사 Sheila

학생이 쓴 원문

Gender equality is important cause it is terms of equal opportunity. We must concede that men and women is not different. They are person. Sexism make a wall each other and then we will be happy.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]! You are indeed right especially in our generation now. Everything is made possible and everything is made to protect the importance of humans. :)

Until the next one! 

See you in class! :)

~Teacher Sheila


Gender equality is important cause it is terms of equal opportunity. 
>>Gender equality is important cause it is a term of equal opportunity.

We must concede that men and women is not different. 
>>CORRECT
OR>>We must concede that men and women are just the same.

They are person. 
>>They are persons.
OR>>They are humans.

Sexism make a wall each other and then we will be happy.
>>Sexism makes a wall to divide the gender.
OR>>If we remove the wall of sexism then we will be happy.

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