What is your opinion on the worsening state of korea\'s economy? how do you think can this be fixed?

2019-05-09 · 첨삭 강사 Ally

학생이 쓴 원문

I think the minimum wage system is a major drawback. Labor costs, rent and inflation goes up every year by increasing minimum wages. But there is an opinion to fix this problem. the minimum wage system needs to be classified by region. Major city possess more wealth and economy so they can create better economy than small town or city. Therefore major city should take more responsibility for a wage level so that minor city can reduce the burden of wage increase.

강사 첨삭

Hi, Joe!



Thanks for sending this composition. ^^

I agree with your proposed solution!

I think everyone would be benefitted if this was actually imposed.


~~t. Ally



---------------------------


I think the minimum wage system is a major drawback.
>> CORRECT!


 Labor costs, rent and inflation goes up every year by increasing minimum wages.
>> CORRECT!


 But there is an opinion to fix this problem.
>> CORRECT!


 The minimum wage system needs to be classified by region.
>> CORRECT!


 Major city possess more wealth and economy so they can create better economy than small town or city.
>> Major cities possess more wealth and a better economy, so they can create an even better economy than that of a small town or city.


 Therefore major city should take more responsibility for a wage level so that minor city can reduce the burden of wage increase.

>> Therefore, major cities should take more responsibility for a proper wage leveling so that the minor cities can reduce their burden in terms of wage increase.

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