What is your reason for wanting to be a flight attendant?
학생이 쓴 원문
After graduated culinary school and worked in F&B field, I felt like I need more achievement and opportunity to work with diverse people.
I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and bring me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experience are gonna be perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experience.
Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.
강사 첨삭
Hello, Rachel!
The Food and Beverage department as well as being a cabin crew are interrelated since they both deal with service and human relations. You are not changing your career totally. You are only adding more skills to what you already have. I think you are doing great at it.
Below, you can see very few grammar suggestions. Your sentences are long and meaningful as well as interconnected by correct transition words. There is also efficiency in your use of vocabulary words. You did a very good job!
Thank you for your diligence. See you again tomorrow!
-T. Donna~
>> After I graduated in culinary school and worked in the F&B field, I felt like I need more achievements and opportunities to work with diverse people.
I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and bring me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
>> I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and what brings me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experience are gonna be perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experience.
>> If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experiences are gonna be/ (going to be) perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experiences. Very good sentence!
Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.
Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.
>> Also, I think that the aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect with people from all over the world and it would be never get boring. Very good sentence!
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.