What was your best trip?

2022-07-19 · 첨삭 강사 Maine

학생이 쓴 원문

My best trip is Tokyo. When I was a senior in University. I absented my last class and I went to the Japan alone. It was a start day in summer vacation. So I wanted to leave right away. I worked part time job in a cafe to get travel money. And that\'s my first trip on myself and alone. First day, it was little bit scared but I adjusted in Japan. Actually, Japan is similar to Korea. They know Korean so it was convenient to stay there. What I was looking forward to the most is the aquarium. I like sea creature. My favorite animal is jellyfish. I saw many kinds of jellyfish. And I bought a jellyfish doll at the gift shop. And then, I arounded streets and playground, I saw the comic books in the bookstore. I went to the beef restaurant. And ate sushi.Iit was unforgettable trip for me. I get a confidence to go another country. Japan is close that can be go any time. That is the most benefit. I will go one more this year.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름] [이름]!
Nice one! You have been writing long answers with explanations.  Learn from your mistakes and keep on going.  Read the corrections always and enjoy studying! ^^


~T. Maine

My best trip is Tokyo. When I was a senior in University. 
>>My best trip is in Tokyo when I was a senior university student. 
I absented my last class and I went to the Japan alone.
>> I was absent from my class and went to Japan alone. 
It was a start day in summer vacation. 
>>It was the first day of summer vacation. 
So I wanted to leave right away. 
>> Correct.
I worked part time job in a cafe to get travel money. 
>> I worked part-time in a cafe to get  some travel money. 
And that\'s my first trip on myself and alone.
>>And that\'s my first trip with myself alone. 
First day, it was little bit scared but I adjusted in Japan.
>>On the first day, it was a little bit scary but I adjusted myself in Japan. 
Actually, Japan is similar to Korea. 
>>Correct. 
They know Korean so it was convenient to stay there.
>> You know that Korea is convenient to stay in. 
What I was looking forward to the most is the aquarium.
>>Correct. 
I like sea creature. 
>>I like sea creatures. 
My favorite animal is jellyfish.
>>My favorite animal is the jellyfish. 
 I saw many kinds of jellyfish. 
>>Correct. 
And I bought a jellyfish doll at the gift shop.
>>Correct. 
And then, I arounded streets and playground, I saw the comic books in the bookstore. 
>>And then, I went around the streets and the playground.  I saw some comic books in the bookstore. 
I went to the beef restaurant. 
>> Correct. 
>> OR: I went to a beef restaurant. 
And ate sushi.Iit was unforgettable trip for me. 
>>And I ate sushi.  It was an unforgettable trip for me. 
I get a confidence to go another country. 
>> I got confidence going to another country. 
Japan is close that can be go any time. 
>>Japan is close to our country so I can go there anytime.
That is the most benefit. 
>>That is the benefit of it. 
I will go one more this year.
>>I will go there one more time this year. 

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