What was your most memorable trip?

2021-09-17 · 첨삭 강사 Faith

학생이 쓴 원문

2 years ago, my parents, my mother in law and my younger brother came to the USA. They all first visited the USA. So, they were really excited to meet me and my husband here. My church members welcomed my family. They gave us American foods and gifts. We usually spent time traveling around the East USA. We went to Philadelphia, Washington DC and Virginia around my house. In addition, we have eaten various foods together. I have prepared meals for them. When I lived in South Korea, I never cooked. So I was happy to cook for my family. Our parents looked very happy. I\'m sure they couldn\'t imagine that we are gathering together in the USA. When they went back to South Korea, my father cried a little bit in the airport. I didn\'t cry in front of my family because I didn\'t want them to remember my tears. I knew that my family always worries and misses me. I wanted to show them that I\'m doing okay here. I\'m grateful that God has given my family such a wonderful opportunity!

강사 첨삭

I couldn\'t imagine the joy that you all shared together there, Jane! I hope you will be reunited soon!-Faith-
2 years ago, my parents, my mother in law and my younger brother came to the USA. 
>> Two years ago, my parents, my mother-in-law and my younger brother came to the USA. 
They all first visited the USA. 
>> It was their first time visiting the USA.
So, they were really excited to meet me and my husband here. 
>> CORRECT
My church members welcomed my family. 
>> CORRECT
OR They were welcomed warmly by our church members.
They gave us American foods and gifts. 
>> CORRECT
We usually spent time traveling around the East USA. 
>> We usually spent our time traveling around the East Coast of the USA. 
We went to Philadelphia, Washington DC and Virginia around my house. 
>> We went to Philadelphia, Washington DC and around Virginia. 
In addition, we have eaten various foods together. 
>> In addition, we ate various foods together. 
I have prepared meals for them. 
>> Also, I prepared meals for them. 
When I lived in South Korea, I never cooked. So I was happy to cook for my family. 
>> Honestly, when I lived in South Korea, I never cooked so I was happy to cook for my family. 
Our parents looked very happy. 
>> Our parents looked very happy too. 
I\'m sure they couldn\'t imagine that we are gathering together in the USA. 
>> I\'m sure they couldn\'t imagine that we were gathering together in the USA. 
When they went back to South Korea, my father cried a little bit in the airport. 
>> CORRECT
I didn\'t cry in front of my family because I didn\'t want them to remember my tears. 
>> CORRECT
OR I didn\'t cry in front of them so that they would only remember the happy memories with me.
I knew that my family always worries and misses me. 
>> CORRECT
I wanted to show them that I\'m doing okay here. 
>> CORRECT
I\'m grateful that God has given my family such a wonderful opportunity!
>> CORRECT

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