what would you do for a living if you are a millionaire?
학생이 쓴 원문
Even if I were a millionaire, I would still want to get a job. Working is not only for making a living or making money, but also for making my life meaingful and valuable. I feel I am alive via havng a job and working. If you do not have job, what would you do? Would you travel all the time? Would you spend most of your time on shopping? No way. Your satisfaction would be higher when you take a vacation from your busy schedule. However, if I am a millionaire, I would feel free to choose a job. I would not work for something that I do not like. I would be working for what I really like. If you do not have to worry about making money, your could be more flexible in selecting your job. In reality, many people work for a living regardless of whether they like their jobs or not. I would feel less stressful if I work for what I like. The job could be regarded as a hobby. I would not invest money in stock, but invest in the real estate market after assessing the risk and return.
강사 첨삭
A pleasant evening to you Sir [이름]!
You deserve a warm of applause for your essay.
You shared a lot of ideas in writing and composed comprehensive and sensible sentences.^^
I am amazed with your ideas and you are already getting used with the basic structure of a sentence.
If you will be a millionaire, don\'t forget me okay? You are really a hardworking person!
I hope you will be more successful these coming years. Keep it up! See you tomorrow!
Teacher Nina
Even if I were a millionaire, I would still want to get a job.
>> Even if I am a millionaire, I would still want to get a job.
Working is not only for making a living or making money, but also for making my life meaingful and valuable.
>> Correct!
I feel I am alive via havng a job and working.
>> Correct! ( Spelling: having^^)
>> OR: I feel I am alive through having a job and working in the office.
If you do not have job, what would you do?
>> If you do not have a job, what would you do?
Would you travel all the time?
>> Correct!
Would you spend most of your time on shopping?
>> Correct!
No way.
>> Correct!
Your satisfaction would be higher when you take a vacation from your busy schedule.
>> Correct!
>> OR: Your satisfaction will be greater when you take a break from your busy schedule.
However, if I am a millionaire, I would feel free to choose a job.
>> Correct!
I would not work for something that I do not like.
>> Correct!
>> OR: I would not work for something that I am not interested in.
I would be working for what I really like.
>> Correct!
If you do not have to worry about making money, your could be more flexible in selecting your job.
>> If you do not have to worry about making money, you could be more flexible in selecting your job.
>> OR: If you do not have to worry about earning money, you could be more flexible in choosing your job.
In reality, many people work for a living regardless of whether they like their jobs or not.
>> Correct!
I would feel less stressful if I work for what I like.
>> Correct!
The job could be regarded as a hobby.
>> Correct!
>> OR: The job could be considered as a hobby.
I would not invest money in stock, but invest in the real estate market after assessing the risk and return.
>> I would not invest money in stocks, but invest it in a real estate market after assessing the risk and return.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.