When I told to a famous person for the first time.

2019-02-14 · 첨삭 강사 Sharon

학생이 쓴 원문

When I was little, I saw a comedian for the first time. I was surprised and so excited. So, I called his name like friend. And then, his manager told me that he is not my friend. At that time, I was a elementary students, I was just excited. After that, I felt gloomy and I wasn\'t excited. The comedian who I met can\'t be seen in the TV anymore because he has gamble.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]!

What an interesting experience.

That must have been terrible to hear as a child.

I\'m glad you got over that.

Please take note of how you begin your sentences.

Stick to the basics and avoid using unnecessary words.

~~ Teacher Sharon

When I was little, I saw a comedian for the first time.

>> Correct
I was surprised and so excited.

>> Correct
So, I called his name like friend.

>> I called his name like he was my friend.
And then, his manager told me that he is not my friend.

>> His manager told me that he was not my friend.
At that time, I was a elementary students, I was just excited.

>> I was only in elementary school that time so I just felt excited.
After that, I felt gloomy and I wasn\'t excited.

>> After he said that, I felt disappointed.
The comedian who I met can\'t be seen in the TV anymore because he has gamble.

>> The comedian I\'m referring to isn\'t on TV anymore because he was a gambler.

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