Which type of people are respected most in your society

2017-12-12 · 첨삭 강사 Rose

학생이 쓴 원문

First, Ms. [Name] who is previous president is respected by the citizen since she gathered parties, progressive and conservative, and anyone couldn’t do same as her I think it’s the first time in the world history. Second, Mr.Park.J.S, who is a famous soccer player in the world before, is esteemed by the people because he endeavored to be a best player although he had a talent for playing soccer. Thus, when people thought about him, they reminded that sentence ‘It’s 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration by Edison’. Third, Mr.Lee, who is a talent whose has plenty of debt almost 30millions owing to failed business, is admired by the people. Although he doesn’t have enough money to live, he doesn’t give up and tries to return money all to the landers. Moreover, he isn’t disappointed from his circumstances and teaches the others how to save money from the wasting things. Therefore, people think he is honorable person since he has been tried to overcome from worse situations

강사 첨삭

Whew! There are certainly different aspects people consider when admiring a person^^

Thank you for doing your homework, Jason!

Have a great day!

>>First, Ms. [Name] who was the previous president was respected by the citizens since she gathered parties, progressive and conservative, and anyone couldn’t do the same as her, and I think it’s the first time in world history.
Second, Mr.Park.J.S, who is a famous soccer player in the world before, is esteemed by the people because he endeavored to be a best player although he had a talent for playing soccer.

>>Second, Mr.Park.J.S, who is a famous soccer player in the world before, is esteemed by the people because he endeavored to be the best player although he had a talent for playing soccer.
Thus, when people thought about him, they reminded that sentence ‘It’s 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration by Edison’.

>>Thus, when people thought about him, they remember the sentence \"It\'s 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration\" by Edison.
Third, Mr.Lee, who is a talent whose has plenty of debt almost 30millions owing to failed business, is admired by the people.

>>Third, Mr.Lee, who is a talent whose debt was almost 30millions owing to failed business, is admired by the people.

Although he doesn’t have enough money to live, he doesn’t give up and tries to return money all to the landers.

>>Although he doesn’t have enough money to live, he doesn’t give up and tries to return the money to the lenders.

Moreover, he isn’t disappointed from his circumstances and teaches the others how to save money from the wasting things.

>>Moreover, he isn’t disappointed from his circumstances and teaches the others how to save money instead of wasting things.

Therefore, people think he is honorable person since he has been tried to overcome from worse situations

>> Therefore, people think he is an honorable person since he has tried to overcome those worse situations.

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