Who is my hero?

2010-09-01 · 첨삭 강사 Connie

학생이 쓴 원문

When I meet bad things, I try to overcome this one as watching a movie,because I like watching movie and it makes me feel happy.One day, 'Spiderman' was showing on the cinema, at that time, I had a bad happening like faught with friends or bad grade of my major. So I really depressed with that. Even I cried. And I decided to change my mind to positive, then, I went to the cinema to do that I want.And I saw a title of 'Spiderman'. I laughed after finging that, and I choice that movie. It was really fun, and I felt cool.I was happy, because of this.Finally I could make up mind like do my best, because Spiderman gave some new power to me.So 'Spiderman' has become my hero.

강사 첨삭

Hi [이름], I’m glad to see you article. It’s a fantasy but I’m okay with it. I’m satisfied because you said you consider him as your hero. Great job in giving me a longer article today. Haha See you tomorrow, -- Connie --   When I meet bad things, I try to overcome this one as watching a movie,because I like watching movie and it makes me feel happy >> When I encounter bad things, I try to overcome it by watching movies because it makes me feel happy. .One day, 'Spiderman' was showing on the cinema, at that time, I had a bad happening like faught with friends or bad grade of my major. >> At the time that the movie Spiderman was showing in the cinema I had a bad feeling because I fought with my friends and I had a low grade in my major. So I really depressed with that. Even I cried. >> SO, I’m really depressed with that, I even cried. And I decided to change my mind to positive, then, I went to the cinema to do that I want.And I saw a title of 'Spiderman'. >> I decided to overcome that feeling so I went to the cinema and saw the movie “Spiderman” I laughed after finging that, and I choice that movie. >> I laughed that and chose that movie. It was really fun, and I felt cool.I was happy, because of this. >> I was really fun, and felt cool. I was so happy because of this. Finally I could make up mind like do my best, because Spiderman gave some new power to me. >> Finally, I made up my mind because “Spiderman” refreshed me. So 'Spiderman' has become my hero. >> So “Spiderman” became my hero.

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