Writing practice.

2016-08-03 · 첨삭 강사 Jeny

학생이 쓴 원문

One of my hobbies is cook. When I was young, My parents used to work together for a living. I had to stay home whole day. no one took care of me and my meals. that's why I became interested in cooking. When I cook at first, just fried an egg. even If I burn the egg, I kept trying to cook. My skills was getting better than before. I started to be responsible for breakfast for my family. I did it till I moved to other city for university. During this period, I could learn how to cook and now I can cook most of Korean dishes. My favorite food which I am good to make is Braised Short Ribs and DdukBokki. Sometimes I felt lonely because no one was in house when I was young. but Thanks to cooking, I could enjoy my time and respect my mother how she did hard for my family. even If I started to cook to forget my lonely, now I really love it

강사 첨삭

Hello there,
Taking time to learn more about grammar could broaden your knowledge. 

Give yourself to learn more and give yourself to remember all the things you\'ve learned.

Have a nice day at work, [이름]!!!

T. Jeny

 

One of my hobbies is cook.

>>One of my hobbies is cooking.

When I was young, My parents used to work together for a living.

>>correct

I had to stay home whole day.

>>I had to stay home the whole day.

no one took care of me and my meals.

>>No one took care of me and cooked for me as well.

that\'s why I became interested in cooking.

>>correct

 When I cook at first, just fried an egg.

>>At first, I just cook fried eggs.

 even If I burn the egg, I kept trying to cook.

>> Even if I burn the egg, I kept on trying.

My skills was getting better than before.

>>correct

I started to be responsible for breakfast for my family.

>>I started to be responsible and cooked breakfast for my family.

 I did it till I moved to other city for university.

>>correct

During this period, I could learn how to cook and now I can cook most of Korean dishes.

>>correct

My favorite food which I am good to make is Braised Short Ribs and DdukBokki.

>>My favorite food which I am good at making are Braised Short Ribs and DdukBokki.

 Sometimes I felt lonely because no one was in house when I was young.

>>Sometimes I feel lonely because no one was home when I was young.

but Thanks to cooking, I could enjoy my time and respect my mother how she did hard for my family.

>>but Thanks to cooking, I could enjoy my time and respect my mother how she did hard for my family.

even If I started to cook to forget my lonely, now I really love it

>>correct 

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