Writing task

2023-03-21 · 첨삭 강사 Caitlyn

학생이 쓴 원문

Working out is the most important method to look good. For making beautiful body, people need muscles. The muscles keep skin elastic. Also, wide shoulder, right-angle shoulder and six-pack are the reward for whom exercises steadily. Working out induces hormone secretion. I guess this interaction is influenced to face skin. Proper hormone secretion controls the pimple.

강사 첨삭

Hi, Robin. 
Thank you for answering your homework. I agree, continuous exercise can make us not only healthy, but also fit.
-T. Caitlyn
Working out is the most important method to look good. 
>> CORRECT
For making beautiful body, people need muscles. 
>> To have a beautiful body, people need to have muscles.
The muscles keep skin elastic. 
>> CORRECT
Also, wide shoulder, right-angle shoulder and six-pack are the reward for whom exercises steadily.
>> Also, wide right angled shoulders and six-packs are rewards for those who consistently exercise.
Working out induces hormone secretion.
>> CORRECT
I guess this interaction is influenced to face skin. 
>> I guess this interaction influences the skin on our face.
Proper hormone secretion controls the pimple.
>> Right hormone secretion controls pimples.

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