Writing Task(Jun 30th, 2022)

2022-07-04 · 첨삭 강사 Roanne

학생이 쓴 원문

What is your birthday wish for this year? I didn\'t have time to wish anything for since my birthday was actually the day my daughter and her friends blew the candle lights. We lighted the candles a few time so that the children could enjoy the moments, blowing the lights. On my birthday, I invited the families of my daughter\'s friends to my house. But my wish this year is the one that has always been my first wish every year : all three of us being in a healthy condition. Recent days, I heard some sad news from my aquaintances about their bad health conditions. That is why I started running and jogging about a month ago in the early morning.

강사 첨삭

Hi, U [이름]! 

That\'s a good wish. I hope your wish may be true. Always keep yourself healthy and fit because it is very important.
Thank you for sharing!

~T. Roanne ^_^
===========================================
I didn\'t have time to wish anything for since my birthday was actually the day my daughter and her friends blew the candle lights. 
>> I didn\'t have time to wish anything for since my birthday since it was actually the day my daughter and her friends blew the candle lights. 
We lighted the candles a few time so that the children could enjoy the moments, blowing the lights. 
>> We lit the candles a few times so that the children could enjoy the moments, blowing the lights. 
On my birthday, I invited the families of my daughter\'s friends to my house.
>> Correct!
But my wish this year is the one that has always been my first wish every year : all three of us being in a healthy condition. 
>> But my wish this year is the one that has always been my first wish every year: all three of us are in a healthy condition. 
Recent days, I heard some sad news from my aquaintances about their bad health conditions.
>> Recent days, I heard some sad news from my acquaintances about their bad health conditions.
That is why I started running and jogging about a month ago in the early morning.
>> Correct!

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